#1 THE SELFIE STICK:
Selfie stick? More like a stick for self-defense (if you follow the guys at Cyanide and Happiness, you will know what I mean). You can always buy a broomstick in its place. It serves more than one purpose, even that which the selfie stick was apparently built to do (I came across a photo of a good man doing this. God bless his soul!) What happened to the good ol’ tripod stand? Or whatever happened to the people around you? I miss those days when someone asks me to take a photo for them, and I click 3 or 4 very blurry shots, and run away before they check them and ask me to shoot again. Prince Harry himself said selfies were bad. And when Prince Harry speaks, we keep calm and listen. Trust me on this one, you will improve your few chances of making it to heaven and you can always thank me later!
#2 THE NEPAL TRAGEDY
I was busy with my(failed) last minute preparations for my math exam when this horrible tragedy struck Nepal, which left more than 7000 dead and more than 12,000 injured and many more homeless. And here we have a bunch of useless nations (they call themselves the UN, pretending to sound important and all) boasting of sending supplies to the affected areas while the Nepalese government is saying they are falling extremely short of supplies. Something’s definitely fishy. If you don’t believe me, here is something I got from Wikipedia:
“Four days after the earthquake UNICEF appealed for donations, as close to 1.7 million children had been driven out into the open, and were in desperate need of drinking water, psychological counsel, temporary shelters, sanitation and protection from disease outbreak. It distributed water, tents, hygiene kits, water purification tablets and buckets. As of 2 May 2015 Nepal’s finance minister said they had not received pledged donations in cash.”
#3 SO NOT THE MATCH OF THE CENTURY
There was only one boxer in the ring that night, and he lost. Yes, I’m Pacman biased, so what? If you compare record wise, Pacman comes out on top. One may argue that Mayweather is a calculated boxer, but, the fact is, I really don’t care. Haters gonna hate, ever heard of that? In Philippines, people were asked to switch off their refrigerators so that there would be enough power for the match. Ha. Fridges for a fight. How about rich-ass money burning people for poverty? Sounds mellifluous, no? A fan sued Manny Pacquiao for not revealing his shoulder injury before the match started and was not allowed to take a shot (its an injection, not the shot you were thinking about) for the pain. I would have done the same, given those unreasonably high ticket prices. The match stats aren’t out yet, but they can easily touch the unheard of 5 million mark. And now Mayweather is still hazy from the (totally unfair) win and is actually ready for a rematch with Manny. I wonder what people will be asked to switch off for that one. Maybe their common sense. Nah, that was already switched off long ago.
#4 THAT (ROYAL) PINK BUNDLE OF JOY!
It’s a girl! Oh and that name! How lovely! I’m feeling happy just saying it. Charlotte Elizabeth Diana. Oh how I love the name! She takes after her father I guess, which is a great thing. Let’s just hope she doesn’t go bald in her twenties itself! But it’s the betting part that pisses me off. Who cares what the royals name their kids or grandkids? All they do is deduct tax from your salary and use it to buy golf courses. I mean if it’s a girl or a boy, how does it even matter? And really who cares what the name will be? Ugh. How immature. Going gaga over a name. Give me a break already!
Oh and Prince George is an older brother! How cute! Yay!
#5 IRONMAN RAN OUT OF IRON
The recent installment of The Avengers was awesome, as usual. But there is another reason why I liked it better. The fact that even the best can be at fault sometimes and everyone is tempted for the easier way out. Hate me or love me for it, but the truth is I’m not a fan of Tony Stark (mind you, I said Tony Stark, not Ironman). He has an attitude about him that I really can’t stand, a kind of know-it-all-ness. I’m actually happy that it was Tony who messed up this time and he (sorta) gets blamed for the consequences. He almost got my darling Jarvis killed! Well, at least Ironman sets everything right at the end and hopefully, Tony Stark had something to learn about. And Dr. Banner, when you said “We are mad scientists”, you should have said instead, “Umm..you, not we”. But good thing you didn’t. We would have missed out on an amazing movie!