Pros and Cons of Arrange Marriages
Arrange marriage is a type of martial union where two unknown people are united by the third person. The groom and the bride are selected by parents, relatives or by family members. These types of marriage were common until the 18th century. In early days, the bride and the groom used to see each other only on the day of their wedding. Thus, this arranged marriage was also forced marriage for few. But as elders decide about the life partner, it is a kind of safe marriage where the bride and the groom will get to have a safe and secured life as elders take good decisions as they are more experienced in their life. These arrange marriage has its own pros and cons. I hereby tell you about 5 sensible pros and cons of arranged marriage.
Pros of arrange marriage:
- Secure life:
In arrange marriage, parents will be the match, makers. As parents always want their children to marry a person who is equally educated with good earning and who is well settled in their life. It’s obvious that they choose a perfect match for their child who has all the above qualities. Thus arrange marriage leads to having a beautiful secured life.
- Close to culture:
Arranged marriages are meant to marry a person who has the same nationality, religion, culture, tradition, and also who have their mother tongue similar. People are so specific in these things that they search for years to get a perfect match. And of course, it’s required to get a perfect match as both of them spend their entire life with each other building their own new family. Thus arrange marriages will make the culture and traditions as close as possible and a religion issue does not arise at all.
- Family connections lasts forever:
The bride and the groom are fixed by their family. Both families will have a good relationship between each other and all the connections between the family and the newly married couple will last long without any misunderstandings. Where as in love marriages, it’s complicated because; the family of the bride may or may not like the groom or vice versa. This creates major differences among their families.
- Similar values:
As I said earlier arrange marriage are decided by parents, as they are well experienced in their life they will definitely find good and compatible one who will have similar thoughts, passion, likes and dislikes. This will be an advantage where a similar way of living can create good bonding between two unknown’s and love begins to blossom gradually among the married people.
- Worrying about children future is diminished:
Yes! This is one among the major pros of arrange marriage as Indian’s bother more about religion and culture. In this type of marriage, two people of similar nationality, religion marry and this will not create any sort of problem to decide about their children religion, as both of them are of same religion. So worrying about children future religion as in the case of inter-religion marriages is completely diminished.
Cons of arrange marriage:
- Lack of understanding:
Parents may find a person having similar qualities. But every individual’s unique taste cannot be matched. The groom or a bride will be wishing to have their own choice of life partner, but arrange marriages will suppress all those wishes and try to make two like poles to get attracted, which is practically impossible. This will lead to a lack of understanding because of the marriage between two unknowns, who don’t even have any idea about each other’s personal taste. This will gradually lead to arguments, unwanted discussions, and also fights.
- No choice of separation:
In India, parents marry their children at a very grand wedding hall, giving huge amount of dowry to the groom and by calling each and every relative, friends, and well-wishers to bless their child as it is a matter of pride and honor. When all this goes on so well, there is no choice of separation among the newly married couple at all, as they are married in front of many people and it is also a matter of their parent’s dignity and honor. This is not only the situation where a couple cannot get separated. In case, if the couple is least bothered about the society and if they really want to get separated, their families will not support as they are the one who chose them to be together. This creates a situation where none of them is happy.
- Lack of Trust:
Lack of trust among each other as both of them doesn’t know about each other well. When there is no trust, it automatically leads to unwanted arguments between each other.
- Conflict between families because of dowry:
In India, dowry is the most common and major disadvantage faced by arranged marriage. Elders decide about the marriage and even about the give and take policy. I meant to say dowry. Yes! Of course, it’s a give and take the policy where people exchange their daughter and money for a highly qualified, well-settled groom. This system creates conflict among both the families when bride’s families fail to reach the expectations set up by the groom’s family. This also spoils the husband-wife relationship.
- Family pressure may lead to force marriage:
Arrange marriages are most likely to be forced marriages as children are forced to marry the person of their parents’ choice, as parents want their child to lead a good life by neglecting their wishes and by suppressing their desire to marry a person of their choice. This gradually creates a forced marriage which will be of no use, because of this neither the married one’s are happy nor their families.
Written by Yashasvini
Yashasvini is an engineering, student. She is a pet lover and interested to do new things. She is a beginner who loves penning about all sorts of topics because she likes to learn about everything that she is capable of.