Thursday, September 24, 2020

North Korea’s New Invention: Hello Rice, Bye Bye Hangovers!

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I enjoy my weekends out.

You know, letting go, enjoying yourself, downing a couple of drinks. Especially, the downing a couple of drinks part.

images (1)

You know what I don’t enjoy, though?

Waking up Monday morning with a splitting headache, my mouth dry, and this inescapable feeling of nausea.

That’s fancy speak for waking up hungover.

Hangovers are Monday’s punishment for letting loose on the weekends.

Well, that and having to actually work on Mondays (8 am college lectures are NOT fun).

North Korea's New Invention: Hello Rice, Bye Bye Hangovers! 1
www.independent.ie

In a perfect world, we’d have alcohol without the repercussions of hangovers.

And apparently, North Korea agrees with me, and decided to help in the creation of a perfect world (I know, ironic, right?).hangovers

So, how was this magical hangover free alcohol made?

Well, it’s made from ginseng and glutinous rice and has been christened ‘Koryo Alcohol’.

Not too many images from North Korea have been shown to the rest of the world, but from what I can see, it seems like a pretty sober place.

Not exactly the country, that has its citizens fighting a hangover and unproductivity on a Monday after a weekend of getting to know alcohol extremely well.

Well, it seems like the kind of place that does this a lot:

images (2)
And its most fun moments are something like this:

unnamed (1)So the hangover free alcohol, (yes, no hangover, no matter how much you drink).

This unique nirvana has been attained from the Taedonggang Foodstuff Factory. The glutinous rice here has been described as “glutinous rice cultivated by an organic farming method in the country” by North Korea’s official newspaper, The Pyongyang Times.


North Korea's New Invention: Hello Rice, Bye Bye Hangovers! 2

The role of the RICE, in this case, is crucial. It replaces sugar in the manufacturing process – rice is boiled and takes away from the bitterness of the ginseng.

(I honestly am not really sure what ginseng is, but the words ‘hangover free alcohol’  helps me ignore any unpleasant suspicions about ginseng I might have.)

So most importantly, the rice and ginseng make from liquor that is, ‘suave and causes no hangover’.

The makers claim that this contains 30-40% alcohol by volume.

Consider this – BUDWEISER, everyone’s favourite beer contains 5% of alcohol by volume. We could say that Koryo is thus, technically… Un-Weiser.

(Yes, yes, I am in fact hilarious.)

There are jokes going around about the real secret behind Koryo’s magic is that:

It tastes so horrible that you won’t be able to drink enough to actually get hungover.

I hope not. I enjoy the idea of weekends without the punishment of the Monday-morning-headache.

images

Even if it does taste too horrible to actually get hungover on, let’s consider this: This is North Korea, where (I’m assuming) not much can be appreciated.

Citizens probably just spend a lot of time appreciating the democracy that’s being denied to them by their delightful dictator. So this is a big deal for the country. Almost as big a deal for the country as it is for budding alcoholics/ alcoholics. So let’s take a moment to celebrate Koryo – the magic drink. Till I’m able to try it, though…

Well… this is me.unnamed (1)

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