Asshole or Arsehole = pronunciation (aes houl) noun (plural: assholes or arseholes). A jerk, mean, obnoxious, intrusive, rude person.
Do you think your presence makes people uncomfortable?
people tend to leave the very moment you enter in the room?
Are you single even after being involved in hundreds of relationships?
Well, the list of such questions is too long and pointless. The whole motive to ask these questions is to tell you, that you fall in the category of ASSHOLES and worship ASS-HOLISM. Congratulations!And, if, in any case, you are confused (confused if you are an asshole or not), then these points will help you in the process of your introspection.
Table of Contents
1. You think you are the best Homo sapien that has ever lived.
Dude! Never heard about Einstein, Stephen Hawking, Mark Zuckerberg and many more smart asses.
2. You talk, walk, eat, sleep, pee, and poop INSULTS. It’s like every time you speak; you insult.
Even that’s the way you compliment people.
3. You have a hard time pretending that you CARE.
Mark my words, I said PRETEND. Because C’mon, let’s face the truth. You know you don’t care AT ALL about anything else but YOU. And since you can’t even pretend, you are an asshole.
4. Okay! So you have this incurable disease of Interrupting between people and their chats.
Where you don’t just interrupt, you also try to correct them (unnecessarily).
And you won’t mind doing it again and again and AGAINNN. And the worst part is – You won’t apologize once for interrupting those poor fellows.
5. Your friends have never really seen you smiling and if once in the blues, you try smiling.
Even that attempt is as fail as I’m in mathematics.
6. First of all, you don’t interact much. But then, when you finally try on the internet, you end up raising World War 3, even 4 sometimes.
7. However hard you may try to act as a self-dependent, smart, “I’m happy alone” and “I don’t need anyone kinda person”. Deep inside you know, YOU ARE AN ATTENTION WHORE.
And, you would do almost anything to get that attention.
8. Coming to your Relationship Status.
Your desperation level is none of our business but, you do want to be in a relationship, FOR SURE (No matter how hard you deny). But when it comes to your breakup, no breakup is bad enough to drift your dumbass mountain.
9. It’s not just your mouth; it’s the whole of you which is full of shit.
Doesn’t matter if you are sitting with a president, or with your family members, you have no shame in blabbering anything that comes first in your mind. Not even once will you bother to think, at least once, before you pop-off something irrelevant outta your mouth.
10. Everyone else’s opinion is Wrong to you.
That day isn’t far away, when you will come up and say that the Earth is not sphere but hexagonal in shape; that apple falls on the ground, not because of gravity but because of a yellow dragon who holds the earth in his hand and due to his slight sticky paws, we can move and run on earth; and many more amusing theories.
11. Ever heard of GOOD MANNERS, DUH!
You bump into people but leave without apologizing, you abuse a person unnecessarily, you do not hesitate in pin-pointing anyone in front of everyone and you NEVER EVER apologize.
12. A-POLO- What??.
You don’t even know what that is. And it’s not because you are an illiterate. It’s because you are a dickhead.
13.You don’t believe in doing favors.
It won’t be surprising if you do not give water to a person who is coughing his lungs out. And all because you are too lazy to move your butt from the bed.
But yes! You won’t mind doing it if that person offers you a Lamborghini or two Spanish girlfriends.
14. You NEVER pay attention to what the other person is saying.
Even if that person is standing just behind your ears. Reason being- You are too busy handling your own overrated dramas.
15. All you care for is you and only YOU.
Your friend comes up to you and informs about his mother’s death. And in the midst of nowhere, you start complaining about how your pubic hairhas started growing too fast, and you are fed-up of them.
16. You have a GOD COMPLEX.
You think that every single person living on this planet owes you something, and you are the GREAT ALMIGHTY. Like seriously! Get over yourself.
Obnoxious, Dickhead, Hypocrite, Self-centred, Asshole(obviously), and many more names are still to be discovered.
You do feel bad about yourself sometimes but in the end, you realize that this is the way you are. And things cannot be changed. And somewhere deep inside you know, that you like being an ASSHOLE.